Well, it's almost here.
The end of baby vacation. (HA!)
I go back to work next Monday, and it brings much more than just feelings of apprehension.
I made a committment to go back to work, and the agreement was to work 20 hours a week. Very doable, right? I think so?
Let me break it down.
On Mondays and Thursdays, I will work from 8-5. I will leave the house at 7:45, and pick Charlotte up from Grandma's around 5:30. That's nearly 11 hours without seeing my sweet loving baby's smile, snuggling her before nap time, and hearing her coo.
We've gotten a baby sitter only 3 times so far, and at the most it was for 4 hours. The thought of someone else (even though it's a loving Grandma) feeding and rocking and laughing and playing (for hours and hours and hours) with her just breaks my heart.
This is when I tell myself to "SUCK IT UP WOMAN!!" and I give myself a little pep talk.
It will be great to contribute financially to our household, to have adult conversations, and to help people through my job. I might feel like I'm less of a drag to be around, since all I have to talk about is baby hiccups and which diapers prevent a blowout. I just fell asleep thinking about how boring I am right now.
And besides that, I will still have 4 and a half days with the little stinker. It's good to have some time apart, and it's wonderful that we have such wonderful moms to help!
An added bonus to going back to work is that I will be watching less TV.
Why oh why???? are there so many hormone replacement commercials on during the day? If I have to listen to one more over tanned middle aged woman talk about her libido...I might just sign up for it myself! kidding.
I know I will miss my little girl so much. But just like coming home after birthing the little monster, it's going to be a big change. I think it took me a good 8 weeks to get into a decent "routine" (the loosest translation of the word is more like it), so I expect that it will take about that long after I go back to work to really get the hang of it.
When people told me that the first year of their baby's life was a blur, I thought they were joking. I now can see how that's a possibility. So here's to the next 9 blurry months!